Contentment

I learn so much from my children. Who knew that these precious little people that God gave us to love and raise would become the most significant iron that sharpens iron (Proverbs 27:17) in my life, well maybe second only to my husband. I watch as they grow and learn life's lessons naturally and God uses those moments to speak right to my heart.

Laura is currently learning a huge lesson in boundaries and object permanence. She has recently mastered her roll and is all over the place. She is loving her new independence and freedom as I set her down on the floor in one place in the room and I watch as she rolls herself all the way to the other side with no inhibition. She sees a toy she wants and she then rolls to it and plays with it. It's a great stage, even if it creates more work for this Momma.

One thing Laura does not understand is things that block her way. She will roll herself into one of Will's larger toys, a rocking chair, furniture and even at times a wall on her way to something else and get stuck. Instead of re-routing her course she will lay there and roll and roll into the object getting more and more frustrated with every effort. She wants it to move and doesn't understand why it won't.

She handles the object in her way with stubborn frustration. The fussing about the preventing object and not getting what she wants can get quite animated. She throws her whole body into it and at times can hurt herself when she's coming up against something hard like a table or wall with her head. It's a tough lesson to learn but those objects are not going to move no matter how much she wants them too because it's not where she is supposed to go. She's going to have to find a better route and trust the way prepared for her.

As I watch Laura struggling this morning, I hear that still small voice speak to me. I identify with my daughter. I've been struggling a little myself lately. My struggles aren't with physical objects like a table but rather with trusting the plans God has for me and His timing rather than the plans I want for myself and when I want them to happen. Instead of graciously with humility trusting His lead on the path prepared for me, I get discouraged when things aren't going how I want and ungratefully resist submission. I silently rebel, rather than trusting the Hand that has faithfully and generously provided for me for thirty years.

I speak about the objects in Laura's way and make my home sound unfriendly to kids, but what I didn't point out is that she has much space that has nothing to obstruct and only things to stimulate her independent little self. If she would just find contentment and exist there she could roll until her little heart's content. I can see the big picture and know what is best for her. You should see the amount of toys and the child proofing that has occurred! She doesn't have to hit her head against a wall both literally and figuratively.

I'm guessing God feels the same way about me. I hear Him saying, look at all I have provided for you. Look at our history, I Am wild but I Am faithful. Look at how much space and favor I have poured out on your life. Exist there. Find contentment there. Trust me there. Serve me there. Get over yourself. It will be a lot less frustrating to trust me and there is untold blessing if you can just be still and know (Psalm 46:10) that the plans I have for you are good and not harmful (Jer. 29:11). Patience, my short sighted child.

I think working on contentment is a good place to start. I read recently in my quiet time that the beginning of contentment is gratitude. I have so much to be thankful for that this is a perspective I know I can practice if I just remember to keep it forefront in my mind. Now if I can just help my sweet Laura from continuing to hit her head on the wall, literally, while trying to roll through it and knock it down. I'll just redirect her attention to her sweet baby doll that she loves so much and show her what she does have and where she can go.

I'm so thankful for my little lessons. They teach me so much about myself, every day.